Kanye West performs in leather kilt, appeals to largely untapped Celtic leatherdaddy demographic
Even though he wore a leather kilt over leather pants during last year’s Watch the Throne tour, this year’s donning of a Givenchy-designed pleated kilt at the 12-12-12 Hurricane Sandy benefit show snagged more attention. That shit … pretty expected at this point, actually.
Cee-Lo signs on for Vegas residency and Christmas album, city of Atlanta puts him up for adoption
Gnarls Barkley and “Fuck You” were probably omens of what was to come. The Goodie Mob founding member announced this year his residency, “Cee-Lo Green is Loberace,” at Planet Hollywood, as well as releasing a Christmas album called Cee-Lo’s Magic Moment on the Elektra/Asylum label imprint, making him the softest ATLien to date.
Green Day’s Billie Joe Armstrong smashes guitar onstage, becomes 2012’s highest paid baby
After his set was cut short at Las Vegas’ iHeart Radio Festival in september, the Green Day frontman melted down into a gluey mess of expletives, proclaiming his rock veteran status before giving Clear Channel (we assume) the finger and storming off stage.
Chubby Korean kid’s “Gangnam Style” becomes most viewed YouTube video of 2012, half of Stanford University updates “influences” tab on Facebook
In one of the most brilliant moves in modern music, K-pop pseudo-satirizer PSY is responsible for the first YouTube video to hit a billion views. And in true YouTube form, the content doesn’t get more straight-forward: “I’m a guy … a guy who has bulging ideas rather than muscles.” God bless Korea.
Harvard baseball team choreographs “Call Me Maybe” YouTube cover, accidentally admits Ivy League sports are stupid
My own views of Carly Rae Jepsen’s single “Call Me Maybe” notwithstanding (I fucking love it), the cover recorded by a bunch of Harvard baseball players was genius. This exact reaction happened at least 17 million times across the globe: “Ahmahgah Carly Rae Jepsen! BOYS! Ahmahgahhhhh baseball playerzzzz! RWAAAAARRRR!”
John Travolta and Olivia Newton John release Christmas album, nation’s Walmart employees briefed in riot control
Because no one quits while they’re ahead anymore, Olivia Newton John and John Travolta have reunited on 13-track This Christmas, released on Universal’s catalogue music division UMe. This is also our 2012 pick for “Best Implement of Negative Reinforcement for Retail Productivity.”
In the wake of this year’s Coachella surprise, NASA works around the clock to replace its onboard computers with Death Row artists
When the first presentation of the holographic Tupac at 2012’s Coachella was leaked online, there weren’t many to say “I knew it!” Some reported getting teary-eyed at the artificial return of their thug life hero. Others were disgusted. Most were just glad Nirvana wasn’t headlining.
Lionel Richie announces country album, becomes second black cowboy
Singer of R&B jam “Hello” and former Commodores member Lionel Richie began his 2012 with Tuskegee, which spent the first half of the year as Billboard’s top-selling country album. We’re anxiously awaiting fellow Commodore Timothy McClary’s dubstep album, She’s a Brick House Beep Bloop Bleep Skrillex Rules.
Snoop Lion releases Reincarnated, confirms only prerequisite of becoming a reggae artist is smoking a ton of weed.
I don’t know if this album is so much reggae as it is a bunch of breakdowns from rap songs extended. Maybe with some one-drop beats and kids singing, too. But the point is, it sounds like Snoop Dogg snapped and decided everyone should just get along, maaaaan.
“Wait, he’s gay? But he’s so good!” say millions of suddenly out-of-touch Frank Ocean fans
When chart-climbing R&B singer Frank Ocean announced on Tumblr that his first love was a man, the Internet flooded with comments like, “I don’t care that he’s gay, I still like him,” or “I can’t relate to him now that I know he sings about men.” In other news, dumb.